RPN Interview On GGH Podcast

Wednesday, December 16, 2020

Even Trump Animatronic Rejects Election Fraud Case




MAGIC KINGDOM PARK, FLORIDA - After weeks of filing lawsuits in various courts and states, President Trump has had no success in overturning the results of the 2020 election. Most recently, the Supreme Court of the United States has dismissed a case from Texas seeking to reverse the results in Michigan, Georgia, Pennsylvania and Arizona and win President Trump reelection.


Seeing no other route to victory, the President is now taking his case to the only remaining option, Walt Disney’s  The Hall of Presidents. Trump stated, “When the real world is rigged against me, I have to go to a world of fantasy.”


He continued, Mickey balloon and turkey leg in hand, “If anyone will understand how fraudulent and corrupt this election was, it’s all the great presidents, and some not so great... everybody says, ‘Mr. Trump, why were the presidents so great?’ And I tell them, ‘Well, some of them were not so great. You know? Some of them were real losers.’ Not like me. I won this election. There’s no way I didn’t win this election, and you’ll see that here today.”


His hopes were quickly dashed, however, when the entire hall of 45 American President unanimously rejected the court filing. In a statement written by the Animatronic Trump, “Nobody knows more about Fake News than me. I’m fake, all these other guys are fake. Everything in this whole place is fake. We live next door to a haunted house. You ever go in there? The Haunted Mansion! It’s full of spookies and ghosties, and they’re all fake........ ‘Dear? Will the ghosts come to scare us today?’ ‘No, darling. The ghosts aren’t real. Is the wind blowing, darling? I don’t want powdered sugar to blow on my suit.’ I know fake. Believe me, I know fake like nobody you’ve ever seen, and this whole fraud business is as fake news as that Yuge Thunder Mountain. It’s a fake rock. Case dismissed.”


President Trump ended his disappointing day in the park by riding The Carousel of Progress, where at least the outdated sexist jokes would offer him some comfort.



Joe Scoop

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